All is well with my soul

Some days, I’m really thankful for Facebook. Today is one of those. The ability to see what we’ve shared in the past is definitely an opportunity to gauge, change, or redirect today. I am so truly humbled, blessed, and covered in grace.

Two years ago I shared:

Other than the day my beautiful girl came into this world, I don’t think I’ve ever cried so many tears of joy. I’ve spent the last two weeks being off FB, which isn’t a bad thing, and it has been time well spent with family and in a state of “RE” – REst, REcuperation, REjuvination, REpurpose.

I received the best news ever this morning. My results from Monday’s procedure came back benign. This is the first time EVERYTHING removed came back benign and the first time in 6 years that there was NO signs of cancer in the polyps.

There are no words to express the love and gratitude for all the love, support, prayers, texts, messages, hand holding (and hair holding as I puked my brains out Sunday and Monday), FB posts (I have the best 20171111_191635little sister in the world), and words of comfort. I am truly the most blessed person in the world. God is great!

A year ago, I shared the above status with the added comment:

What a year it has been! People ask where I get my enthusiasm and positive outlook. It comes from waking up each morning knowing God has a bigger purpose for me than I can ever imagine. It comes from knowing that in the darkest times, He’s always been there. You only get so many second chances to truly live your life … so do/be/live/love what makes you happy / sets your soul on fire / makes you feel alive. Live a life full of adventure, stories, love, and laughter! It’s all about choices my friends!

Five months ago, which I didn’t post about, I received yet another positive (meaning good) report. It may suck @ss that I have to go in every year, but it does beat the alternative!

The reason of this post is to stop and pause and reflect. We (including myself) get so wrapped up in the day to day little things that, at the end of our life won’t amount to anything…and we forget the BIG things that have happened to us. We spend so much time in the she said/he said, drama of social media, hurt feelings, and what we feel we are owed or due that we forget what has been given to us – without any repercussions, cost, or action on our part.  So, no matter what comes up in my day to day, I am going to remind myself to reflect on what God has done for me, how much he loves me, and none of the garbage will matter in the end. The post served as a reminder today of how great life really is and how amazing God is.  Live BIG my friends!

Love, peace, and pie!


PS. If you are old enough to be reading this, you are old enough to get a well woman/man check-up. Do NOT wait until the recommended ages. Had I waited until the recommended age for a colonoscopy, I’d be dead. If you have a parent who was/has been treated or diagnosed with cancer or severe issues of any sort, it is recommended to be tested 10 years younger than the age they were diagnosed. Get over yourself, and get checked out!

The Cowboy Rides Away

As I stood in the garage, barefoot, wearing a tank top and boxers, all I could think was, “RED, WHY AREN’T YOU FB_IMG_1499222222133_1503627357478_1503800959570PACKED AND READY TO GO?” I continued to just stand there and watch as the cowboy loaded his belongings into the truck – his clothes, bedroll, saddles, and guitar…when he stops and comes to set a saddle at my feet so that I have a good seat to take care of the horses while he’s gone. “You gonna miss me just a little?” he asks? “Miss you? Who are you?” I laugh as he wraps his arms around me.

The night before, as we laid curled up together on the bedroll, the Cowboy wishing I could go with him… I think to myself, “well, you know, I could. It would take me all about 20 minutes to throw my stuff together.” I laid there quietly contemplating my response…and praying for the right words. There’s only one place the words I was about to speak came from, because they were SO not what I was feeling!

“You know, I could go. But this is your trip. Your adventure. Of course, he interjects that it is  ‘our adventure.’ I think to myself and say out loud…”hmmm, no. This one…this trip that you’ve been called too…this is yours. All yours. You suffered through the horror and the heartbreak. This is part of YOUR healing. You go….and be open to what God has in store for you. OUR adventure will come soon enough.”

As he put the truck in reverse and drove out in the darkness of the early morning, I just stood there under a blanket of stars, wrapped in the comforting warmth that that can only come from the 4 a.m. heat and humidity. Just as I was about to call him and tell him to turn around and take me to Montana with him….an alarm popped up on my phone reminding me to pray for my partner . So, I stopped, opened the app and I kid you not…this was the scripture and prayer for the morning:

He Would Rejoice in Decreasing

The one who has the bride is the bridegroom. The friend of the bridegroom, who stands and hears him, rejoices greatly at the bridegroom’s voice. Therefore this joy of mine is now complete. He must increase, but I must decrease. ~ John 3:29-30

Far from being envious of the growth of Jesus’ influence, John the Baptist tells his disciples he like a man rejoicing at the happiness of his friend, the bridegroom. Rather than causing us sorrow or jealousy, our decrease and Christ’s increase should be a source of joy. Let us pray today that our partners would rejoice at the increase of our Savior’s glory in their jobs, relationships, home-life, and every other endeavor.
Father, it is a constant temptation to strive for the increase of our own glory, but we see in your Word that true joy comes when we decrease and You increase. You know my partner’s dreams and goals, and You gave Him the talents and abilities he has. Please give him an undivided heart, one that rejoices at each opportunity to make much of You and less of himself. May he have opportunities to use his gifts through Your power, for Your glory and his joy. Amen.

Well played God, well played.

It was reading the last three sentences that caused me to stop dead in my tracks, tears streaming down my face, and that’s when I cleared my phone out before it dialed his number.

I sent him a text telling him that I missed him already, and that he was extraordinary and had been given everything he needed to set the world on fire. And he is doing just that. And I couldn’t be more humble or proud. I also sent him this quote:

There is “hoping” your life will improve and then there is the fire. A deep obsession to change and become better, to forge a vibrant and abundant life by sheer will, daily struggle, the guts to push yourself and be extraordinary. – Brendon Burchard

What I’ve learned is:

Relationships aren’t all daisies and daylight. They are dry patches of grass and darkness. They are not 50/50 or even 100/100. Sometimes, they’re 10/90, 1000/1, or any other combination of ratios depending on where you are in your journey, life, struggles, experiences, what side of the bed you woke up on. In a relationship, especially strong ones, there should be no ratio as to who does what nor should it be measured. You do what you have to to support the other person. Sometimes, that means standing in the garage in your jammies as the person who holds the key to your heart drives away for another round of adventures. Sometimes, it is about putting their needs first. Sometimes, helping the person you love means letting go of that person so that they can find what truly soothes their soul, sparks a fire in their spirit, and heals their wounds. Sometimes, it is taking a step back and being what and who they really need, not what you think they need. Watching him drive away on this short trip hurt more than when I put him on a plane for the 40 day trip…and he didn’t have cell phone service then!

ShawnI would encourage you to check out Gus’ blog on Heroes and Horses website. After you read it, be sure to check out Heroes and Horses and how they are making a difference in the lives of our combat veterans.

Fast forward…the 4-5 day trip has turned into a 3-4 week trip, which may turn into a 3 month trip, which may turn into…who knows what God has planned for us, but I do know that God is doing amazing things and the Cowboy is finding his center. His balance. His fire. His passion. Where God will lead me to support the Cowboy in all of this while using the fire and passion He’s given me…well, I guess y’all will just have to stay tuned!
Love, peace, and pie!

De Colores!

ee33712f9709fa6541d1f74e233263a5Speechless. That’s how the last 4 days left me. Hardly able to string words together to form a sentence (shock, I know). There are no words in the dictionary to describe the journey, the process, the transformation that occurred on my Walk to Emmaus.

I came home today completely and utterly exhausted physically, mentally “drunk”, emotionally calm (which is EPIC), and spiritually made new. Not renewed…because of things I carried that kept me from accepting and believing God’s unconditional love and blessings over my life (there’s a huge difference in knowing and believing )…but new. I am a new woman with a new heart, spirit, soul and well of courage and faith I’ve never had.

I can’t thank everyone enough for the encouragement, prayers, blessings, and love this weekend and am forever humbled by the seeds that Monte, Tiffany, and Rodney planted in my life as well as mine and Gus’ (Shawn) future and the spiritual healing I received through Jimmy and Momma D (not to be confused with our Mama D).

Here is to a lifetime of fresh starts, agape love, grace (and snort) filled adventures, buttermilk pie, divine appointments, family, and freedom!

De Colores!
Live BIG!


Here we go!

You know you need Jesus when you get a police escort to your walk. Just kidding, kind of. The sheriff is in the truck with us!18118910_10101465247644261_8810457037244490729_n_427

Heading to my walk to Emmaus with an open mind and open heart. Thank you to everyone for your prayers and to Rodney and Tiffany for opening the doors for Gus and I this year. “See” y’all Sunday night!


There is Always a Risk

They say, the greatest challenges come before the biggest revelation/blessing. That’s funny in itself because we’ve been under siege since December of 2015! Now, don’t get me wrong. I have had some huge blessings the last year and a half, but also a lot of heartbreak and setback. Last week, the enemy sucker punched me in the stomach and I let him steal my joy and I forgot for a while who I was. No, I’m no one important to you. I had forgotten who I was in HIM but this week, was reminded of how important I am to HIM. Today, as I prepare to leave this week for my Walk to Emmaus, I am reminded of dreams God has put on my heart.

From the archives of 4/21/16:

Your dreams were given to you because God equipped you to be able to accomplish them. He has put everything in motion, surrounded you with the right people, opened doors and moved mountains, just for you. Everything you need will be provided for you at the right time, just keep moving forward!2016_04

There is no dream that is too big or too small, too silly, too stupid, too out of this world. Want to save the world? Go for it. Teach school, join the military, make music, art, movies? Right on. Become the CEO, the janitor, or dig wells in 3rd world countries? Do it with all ya got!

The best part about the dreams we have is that we are only given a small glimpse of what God has in store for us! The future will NEVER look like we imagine, so live in today and make the best of it!

PS: If you don’t have people around you that support your dreams (even if they don’t understand they WHY of what you do), you need to find some new people! No one in your life should ever be holding you down or back – only helping to propel you forward, lifting you up,praying over you, and cheering you on!


Live BIG!

#dreamBIG #rideBIG #liveBIG #loveBIG #believeBIG #heartonfire#redhairdontcare #befierce #beyou